THOUGHT OF THE DAY

Do you suppose Adam (Pac-Man) Jones was listening to the Electric Six's "3-2-1 (I'm the Bomb)" before he went to that strip club in Vegas?

Just an idea I had.

He is what he is...

I need to take 15 minutes to clear up a few things about Greg Oden.

Everybody on Ohio State's campus says that Oden needs to work more on his offensive game.

Yes, Dorothy, he is a freshman center. That happens.

So let's clear out all the crap. Let's stop pretending that Oden isn't the serial hotness because he is. I know what he looks like. I know he looks older than he is, he needs refinement, whatever. He doesn't play with fire, or something. He needs to act excited to be there, he needs to do this, he needs that. That's weak.

Oden's not immature. He doesn't get T-d up or lose control of his emotions in big games. That's why his numbers are so great; he doesn't sulk for ten minute stretches, as college players are known to do (*cough* Josh McRoberts, Joakim Noah).

It isn't his fault that Thad Motta hasn't implemented an offensive scheme that doesn't rely solely on one-on-one basketball. Ohio State played the same way last year with Terrence Dials. They got owned in the tournament. They've lost most of their starters and shouldn't be where they're at.

Stupid remark #1:

"They look stagnant on offense, and that's because of Oden."

They're number one.

Yeah, I know the argument is contrived and occurs by default. Sue me, but don't sue Greg Oden, because it's not his fault. How many Buckeye fans thought they would sweep Michigan State, Purdue, Illinois and IU this year? Do you think they would be there if everyone was jacking up threes? At least Oden can rebound a miss.

Remark #2:

"Oden got used by Noah and was a non-factor against Wisconsin."

He's got redemption against the Badgers this week, and he did have six blocks in that game. Florida was his fourth game of his career, and the first time he was facing a legit team. He's not as clueless now.

Here's what I do know. Greg put up 19 and 9 against Minnesota in 21 minutes. That's a man's work. Oden's field goal percentage is 61 f****** percent. He shoots free throws with his wrong hand at a rate that's perfectly fine for an NBA center. He went 12 for 13 against Iowa. He has nothing left to prove in college.

The NBA's not fooled, folks. He's the number one pick for a reason. Nobody on earth thinks bust when they see Oden. They see Patrick Ewing, which, looking at how the Knicks are now, is a good thing.

*BEGIN OFF-TOPIC RANT*

Today I read an article about Bobby Knight, who complained that the NBA's age limit was the worst thing to happen to college basketball in a long period of time. His basic argument was that these kids had no reason to show up to second semester classes. He's not wrong.

Greg Oden and Kevin Durant are a blessing to watch, but shouldn't be in college uniforms this year. Neither should Bill Walker (is that guy attending second-semester classes out in Manhattan?), nor Brandon Wright, nor Spencer Hawes, nor Chase Budinger. Send 'em to the Big Show.

*END RANT*

And yet OSU fans, seemingly in denial of these obvious facts, seem content to judge Oden on his flaws. Whatever, kids. Save your expertise for football: you ain't got a clue about the hardwood. Memo to Buckeye fans: Who's the most successful pro athlete to come out of here in ten years? It might just be Michael Redd. My eyes, they tell me that when Greg Oden is in a Big 10 game, OSU's opponents become perimeter teams almost exclusively.

Opponent field goal percentage is .401. Opponent threes launched: 602.

Last night, Penn State took 53 shots-26 of which were threes. Last year, they attempted 17. Some guy named Cornley scored 18 points inside. This year, he got 7. Penn State fouled Greg Oden more than Shaq gets fouled on a given night. Five Penn State players had four fouls.

That's the Greg Oden experience. 17-14-3 last night. A one-handed man among boys; a giant among men. The #1 (or #2) pick. The serial hotness.

It's time Buckeye fans follow suit and represent.

Bracketology...

EAST
SOUTH
WEST
MIDWEST


1
UNC
FLORIDA
UCLA
WISCONSIN


2
GEORGETOWN
Ohio State
Kansas
Texas A & M


3
MEMPHIS
SOUTHERN ILLINOIS
Pittsburgh
Washington State


4
Oregon
Indiana
NEVADA
Duke


5
Butler
Virginia Tech
Marquette
Air Force


6
Boston College
BYU
Virginia
Kentucky


7
USC
Texas
Alabama
Stanford


8
Tennessee
West Virginia
SANTA CLARA
Notre Dame


9
Missouri State
Arizona
Kansas State
Gonzaga


10
Vanderbilt
WINTHROP
UNLV
Maryland


11
Oklahoma State
Syracuse
Michigan State
Creighton


12
VERMONT
RHODE ISLAND
Louisville
Xavier


13
BUCKNELL
WRIGHT STATE
AKRON
VCU


14
ORAL ROBERTS
UPENN
SOUTH ALABAMA
DAVIDSON


15
TX-CC
MARIST
LONG BEACH STATE
AUSTIN PEAY


16
CENTRAL CONNECTICUT STATE
play-in
WEBER STATE
EAST TENNESSEE STATE


playin:
JACKSON STATE vs. DELAWARE STATE

Finally, the NFL Season is Over.

I haven't really had much patience for the NFL over the past few years, mainly because the season tends to be long and boring.

John Lorenz wrote a beautiful, magnificently accurate counterpoint as to why the Colts would win, but I couldn't even get my 300 words on the screen.

For those of you wanted to know what I would have said to counter John, it would have looked something like this:

"Peyton Manning will make one completely asinine play that will lead to points for the Chicago Bears. I will now talk for a few paragraphs about Manning's ridiculous failures, including his inability to get the ball past Ty Law's steely hands and his completely ridiculous play in the playoffs up to that point. The Chicago Bears are a team with defensive backs, so they will intercept Manning at least once during a critical juncture in this game.

Additionally, Thomas Jones gets my pick for the "Desmond Howard award." This award goes to the player who has been the most enigmatically disappointing throughout his career, but somehow always comes through on the biggest stage. Past recipients: Desmond Howard (of course), Corey Dillon (he could have been soooo much better than he was), Trent Dilfer, and others.

Thomas Jones falls into the category of players who have been drafted highly but really haven't done enough to be considered "NFL stars." At some point in time, we all recognize that they were worth whatever ridiculously high pick was used on them for a moment, but over the course of their careers, they've either been more trouble than they're worth or disappointing. Ask Arizona how much they love Jones (or J.J. Arrington, or Mike Pittman, or Emmitt, or Edgerrin, or Garrison Hearst...) and you won't get the best response. Ask any team that had Desmond Howard (or last year's candidate, Peter Warrick) why they couldn't play WR.

Those teams never found out why their money guys couldn't perform- even though at times, they showed that they were money guys. We aren't talking about the outright busts of the world: at some point in time, every one of these players was a premium NFL player.

Why do these guys suck so much in the regular season, but perform well in the playoffs? It probably has something to do with lowered expectations. Peter Warrick, Thomas Jones, Desmond Howard, Trent Dilfer... none of those guys have backup talent; however, in the playoffs, they were all (or are all) expected to play like backups because of their prior NFL performance. Additionally, all of these guys have already had the crushing weight of expectations on their careers, so what do they care about more pressure?

No, Thomas Jones will be the X-Factor in this Super Bowl because he already knows the pressure and has the ability (football-wise and mentally) to deal with it in a sufficient manner.

We all talk about how Indianapolis has stopped the run, but if Trent Green had been worth a damn, the Chiefs would have ended the Colts' journey before it had even started. It's time to come represent.

I'm picking the Bears. I believe in Thomas Jones and future Howard recipient Cedric Benson. I believe that we've all forgotten how good Muhammad has been and that he will be the difference in this game at WR. I believe that Manning will stumble and that Grossman will keep it together. I believe in these Bears."

So, that's what I would have said. Unfortunately, I couldn't even get hyped for the game. That's on me.

I don't really know what I have to look forward to for next year: are the Bengals poised to make a run? Will McNabb win the Big Game, or will the Bears finally bring the NFC back to prominence? All of these reasons seem less than thrilling.

So, NFL, you're on the clock, as you have been for some time. You've come through with two reasonable results, but you've left me believing that maybe, just maybe, college football is better. At least it seems like the results matter.

Retroactive Prediction for Super Bowl, courtesy of John Lorenz.

I'm supposed to talk about why the Colts are going to win the Super Bowl in a little over 3 hours. Well...


I don't like the Colts. I don't really know why... maybe it's the logo... maybe it's their team colors... maybe it's their omnipresence in this neck of the woods.* Something about them rubs me the wrong way.


I probably shouldn't. If you ever listen to any color announcer gush over every aspect of the organization, you'd think Peyton Manning just invited them to the prom. Peyton Manning is “the hardest working man in football – constantly studying film and working on precision routes with receivers.” Marvin Harrison is, “a class act all the way,” of course. Joseph Addai is “a fine young man who's going to be very successful in this league.” Tony Dungy is “one of the most dignified men in football, long overdue for the championship he so richly deserves.”


Pardon the Interruption ®, but don't people that deserve championships, win championships? Bill Belichek almost certainly cheated on his wife and had a messy divorce – did he not deserve 3 Super Bowl rings? I'm just so tired of people giving it to this team because they are, quote-unquote, classy. And nobody is a better symbol of this than Peyton Manning. He's unequivocally a great quarterback. You put him in a playoff game against a good team that gets pressure on him and he presses. He gets happy feat in the pocket, forces balls in to situations where they get intercepted, and generally craps out on his team. “Normally Peyton makes that play during the regular season because...” they'll say. The reason he makes that play during the regular season is because he's throwing in the secondary of the Houston Texans. In fact, let's be as controversial as freaking possible here... people like Peyton Manning because he's a loyal, pleasant, polite, funny, tall, white, Christian, Red-State messiah/Adonis – unfortunately for them, he hasn't quite yet proved his quite obvious genetic superiority by winning the big one yet. “But he stayed all four years at Tennessee!” they plead. Did you happen to notice when Tennessee won the National Championship? It's not like he was a one man show there...


He is funny though. His commercials are enjoyable... until they hit the saturating point. When did that happen? Wait... did I just see him in an add for spaying and neutering pets?** Add corporate schill to the list of offenses. Some give me a Sprint cell phone. I need to smash something.


This is an article about why the Colts are going to win the Super Bowl, in case you haven't guessed. Here's why I'd pick the Colts.


It's not because Cato June is outweighed by every Bears offensive player.


It's not because owner Jim Irsay thinks the phrase, “What Would Jesus Do?” is more applicable to whom to pick on draft day or what defensive scheme to run as opposed to say, how to treat other people.


It's not because the Colts traded for Adam Vinateri. Any fun irony that trade could have resulted in faded away when the Colts won on a Manning touchdown drive. Although it was quite nice to see Patriots fans shut up. (On a side note, I think Tom Brady has put up with a lot of crap from that organization. I think it would fun to see Brady traded to another team and lead them to the playoffs. It has the added bonus of finally shutting everybody up who says Brady is the product of the Belichek “system”, whatever that means.)


It's not because Rex Grossman sucks. (Who knows whether he'll go for 4 TD's or 4 INTs?)


It's not because their improved defense has turned things around. Although we're getting on the right track. The Colts defense was awful. Had been for a long time. Someone got pissed off about it and they managed to upgrade it to marginal! They only gave up thirty something to the Patriots, after all... (The success of the Patriots offense has be baffling throughout the season, but let's not kid ourselves and claim they shut down any offensive juggernauts to get to this point.) The point is, they got pissed off. At least someone on that defense had the killer instinct needed to win football games.


The Colts are going to win because someone the defense has smacked Peyton Manning across the face and challenged his manhood in the past two weeks. (If they haven't, they will lose. If I played for Indy, I'd be pissed at how Manning played up until the second half of the New England game.) Whenever the Colts lose, the analysis always comes down to a technical issue, right? Marvin Harrison not a big enough factor... run defense with huge holes... small defensive lineman... Manning not staying in the pocket long enough. It's never, “The Colts just got whooped today.” Well the Bears defense is cocky, arrogant, and will whoop the Colts – except that on the first play from scrimmage, Peyton Manning is going to throw a pass right at Brian Urlacher's gonads and then make some snide comment like, “How's that 'laser-rocket arm' feel?” as he's writhing in pain on the Miami turf, permanently wiping that perpetual smirk he plays defense with off his face. Every great QB has to have moxie and a little bit of gunslinger in them. Remember Elway diving over defensive backs to pick up that first down against the Packers in '97? You never heard anyone talk about him winning the big one from that point on. Folks, let me give you the inside scoop. Peyton Manning is pissed off, and he's not going to take it anymore. The Bears secondary hasn't been the same since Mike Brown got hurt, and Peyton Manning is going to light them up.


So you see, this Super Bowl really is about Peyton Manning.


(I was actually going to pick the Bears to win this game, but talked myself out of it when writing the article. Do you take the points? Both teams are going to play the “no respect card”, right? It's a tough call... Peyton in a big game, AFC dominates NFC, Grossman could be terrible, the Colts D is terrible... I don't know. I think I'm taking the Colts, even with the points.)


(Also, if I have offended any group such as Christians, Republicans, white people, etc. please do not make too much of it. I'm just trying to match the tone for how I think Peyton needs to feel. I do respect him and his fans. But if somebody read this to him right before game time, don't you think he'd go off and pass for 450 yards and 5 TDs, just out of spite? You'll thank me tomorrow morning Colts fans.)


*West Lafayette, IN
**Okay, I made this up... so sue me.